Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Cheeseburger and a Baby Pls

I've been all over the place in the past few weeks. Sometimes I feel fine! Thank you! Sometimes I feel certifiable. Let me tell you about one of the latter times.

So there's this normal-seeming guy at work. He's one of those people who got married recently and had a baby right away. Pretty much every time I've run into him in the last year he has asked the same question:

"So.... are you guys thinking about having kids soon?"

I've demurred several times. Finally after my second miscarriage I said something like:

"I just had a miscarriage." 

So he's like, "Oh. I have a book for you to read."

Weeks and months went by and I never heard any more about the book. I figured I had already read it, since there are approximately 2.7 books about miscarriage in the world. 

Suddenly, last week, he drops by my office to give me a book called Supernatural Childbirth

Omg, you guys. 

Here are some of the claims in the book:

  • all you need to do is pray and you are GUARANTEED children by God
  • if you're having problems conceiving you are not praying enough
  • God doesn't want you to have miscarriages, and if you're having them it's Satan, and you haven't prayed enough
  • you can pray for AND God will grant you a pain-free delivery
  • all birth defects are caused by Satan, and you just didn't pray enough
  • women are cursed by Satan from back in the Garden of Eden
  • you can select the gender, eye color, and hair color of your future child with prayer
Seriously, the author claims she prayed for a 7-pound baby girl with red/blonde hair and blue eyes and guess what? She got what she wanted. Just like the drive-thru at In N Out burger.

The author claims that she was once declared infertile and then she prayed her way out of it. Now she has 4 healthy children! (Of course she gave no actual details of her supposed infertility.)

The book is full of testimonials about people who read her book and listened to her tape. They are like, "I had two miscarriages and then I started listening to your tape EVERY DAY. Now I have a beautiful baby boy!"

I wanted to shred the book to bits (might still do) and scream at this Jackie Mize for espousing complete bull shit (might still do). 

But on the whole, it just makes me sad. I'm deeply saddened by this book and for the women who are desperately trying to pray their way out of tragic fertility problems that are completely out of their control. 

It makes me sad that stereotypes about woman and infertility persist because of books like this one.

It makes me sad that my coworker would own and PASS ON a book like this.

It's sad and pathetic that this woman looks at her 4 healthy children and says, "I did this. Me and my amazing faith." 

How narrow-minded. How sacrilegious. How pathetic. 


10 comments:

  1. Isn't it sad/shocking/hilarious that people believe such things? Makes me lose what little faith I have in humanity.

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  2. Omg me too! It kinda makes me lose my faith in God too. The shred that I have left.

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  3. Wow... that is TERRIBLE!!!! It is heartbreaking to think there are women out there reading that book, thinking that it's their fault they can't get pregnant or can't stay pregnant. And, I can't believe that someone would pass on a book like that to you, as if you need to be told that the miscarriage is your fault.

    Honestly. I have no words. Horrible.

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  4. That's the type of book I'd burn (and I've never said that about a book before). But seriously, that's AWFUL.

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  5. Nobody can tell me that I didn't pray enough for my second pregnancy. I had tons of family and friends praying for it, too. But that didn't make the baby's heart keep beating now, did it?

    What a horrid book. And I say that as a Christian.

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  6. That is absolutely insane! Even putting aside my own atheism, I think this book is just plain cruel. I follow plenty of religious IF bloggers and I know they pray their butts off every single day. I would hate to think how any of them would feel if someone spouted this BS at them. Ridiculous.

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  7. Someone (who herself had several miscarrages and as of yet has still not carried to term...) gave me this book after our 2nd loss... I felt the same way as you! Serioulsy- WTF!! :)

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  8. I would CHEERFULLY kick her and kick her and kick her.

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  9. WOOOOOOWWWWWW!! I want to take that book and smack it across your coworkers head! damf

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  10. Wow. I have no words. I can't believe a book like that actually exists. I prayed really hard for my babies and they died. I'm so sorry someone actually gave you that book. I'd shred it.

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